confused

Assalammualaikum wbt

nothing to say
i just feel
empty

i don't know what to say..
because it deep inside.
i feel very
zero

i really do not enjoying what i am doing right now
and i know something went wrong somewhere
seriously

i do not enjoy my work
it was not boring compared being a promoter
being a waiter is far more exciting than a promoter

i got my vehicle
my freedom
but when i back from work
i opened up the laptop
and i checked my email and so on

little chit chat with my brothers, sister
and even father and mother
and i feel
weird somewhere

i bought a drawing block
set of water colour and brushes
and crayon and a colour's plate

just to bring back my interest
my hobby
what i like to do when i bored a long time ago
i was a champion
but now i cannot even finish a single drawing

and that was trouble
horrible

i tried to paint

so, i try to travel
same
i did not find nothing either
i was just cars, motorcycles, traffic lights
and u know
life was a bore

so, i start thinking
what did i searching for?

material? no
interest? no
girlfriend? no

and sometimes
u try to act like u are good in front of people
and u think everyone praise on you
"ouh, u such a good boy"
"ouh, u are very clever"
"ouh, u such a gentlemen"

what is the praise for?
what is title for?
what is pride for?

i looked at the mirror
"who am i?"
"what i supposed to do?"
"what is 'the thing' that i am searching now?"

can i found it by just
work, back, sleep, online
no

what is it
what

i don't know
..................

memang "panas" la Malaysia ni

assalammualaikum wbt..

cuti...
budak degree..budak asasi..matriks and segala kejadah-nye lah cuti skang ni..
include budak skolah...
best kan cuti?..
lepak..main game..makan..tido..
haha..tu keje aku hari-hari..

sampai la kebosanan..
lesen pun tak brapa hari..

so, memandangkan cuti lama lagi...
although we got FREE money for this month...
aku still rasa this pocket macam bocor  je..
hahahaha...

tulah..orang lain..shopping..cinema..best lah kan..
huhu..
xpe2...

then aku decide mintak kerja...
xde lah susah sngat mintak...
then..masa ni la aku mula nak membebel..kenapa la bnyak pengangguran kat Malaysia ni!!..
mcam-macam keje ada...
apa lah kan?...then curi sana..ragut sini.!!..emo lak kan..

but..masa cari tu..nak apply memanglah senang..nak dapat tu...
erk...susah gila~~
sebab semua tengah cuti..and smua nak duit lebih..

ni mesti sebab gadjet2 cool banyak kluar kan??...
Ipad and segala kejadah tu kan?...so, no wonder la there is one guy who sold his kidney sebab nak beli ipad2 and iPhone..bodoh gila!!..

haisy..pengaruh teknologi......

cakap pasal kerja...

aku dah apply...
seven eleven, reject shop, Tropicana life, Kerja kilang..
but then..smua suruh isi borang je....

Borang reject shop serius kalah borang that i filled for Ireland Uni placement..
panjang gila!!!.....

if x caya...try look at this..

how focus i am..

eh..look at the red tag..HER!! romeo tak?..:P

padahal fire extinguisher..

sebab dah xde bnde nak buat..

kitorang main snap2 Nikon ni kat town..

aku pun tak tau apa yang differentnye -,-"

ok lah..
at last..
aku dapat lah kerje kat oldtown white coffee..
but bukan that day yang aku kluar lah...
aku check through Mudah.my..
then dia panggil interview...

2 bos kot interview!!..2 kali interview..
soklan xbole blah was...
"define what is serve..and i want 5"
erk...
then aku start la merepek...

alaa..dia nak tau basic eng, ngan tau gune komp..
komp mmg dia xtnya la..sah2 la aku call through Mudah..

but then...
masa nak balik...
i found this...

korang tau...

budak pompuan ni..dduk atas riba budak laki tu!!..

and sebelah dia..ade lagi 1 couple...

agak-agak la!!!...

muka sah-sah muka budak skola..

aku nak tegur..but then..kawan-kawan diorang macam ramai je..

x pasal-pasal..hancur muka aku then..

so, aku snap la..peduli apa aku..DSLR..bukan korang tau aku snap apa..

tension kot..

berani gila!!!...

BUDAK SKOLAH!!!...

sebangsa pulak lagi..

-,-

haih..

"Barangsiapa di antara kamu melihat kemungkaran, maka hendaklah ia mengubahnya dengan tangannya, jika ia tidak mampu cegahlah dengan lisannya, dan apabila tidak mampu maka dengan hatinya. Yang demikian itu adalah selemah-lemah iman."  (Hadits riwayat Imam Muslim). 

tak mampu nak sound kat situ..

sound kat sini lah..

and sape2 terbaca ni..jagalah diri tu baik-baik..